Yeah, today I was on time. Well, if there haven’t been any hiccups with the scheduling. I actually wrote this post on Wednesday and told my blog to post it now. I hope it works.
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I decided to post an excerpt from a WIP that is related to my current main WIP. My main WIP is Scrambled: Collecting Strings -Melker Frost. This excerpt is from Scrambled: Collecting Strings -Kiriya Hargrave. The novellas/novelettes take place during the same point in time, but the first POV is different.
He smelled like the air after a thunderstorm, like freshly baked bread, like food when you’re starved, like a barbecue with friends. He smelled like home. I jammed my shaking hands into my pockets, I needed a cigarette.
I sent him a glare, stalked over to the closest free room and slammed the door behind me. I leaned against the door, pulling the phone out of my pocket I speed-dialed my mom. My hands were still shaking, I couldn’t will them to stop.
“Yes?” my mother asked from the other side of the line, she knew it was me.
“Mom, I can’t stay here, please don’t make me stay here, I-” I couldn’t tell her why. “I need more tobacco.”
He really gets under her skin!
Indeed he does. 🙂 (They are both guys, though. I forgot to mention that.)
Especially enjoyed the description at the start of the snippet! Really well done and I could visualize the character’s shakiness over needing tobacco AND the other guy.
🙂 Thank you very much!
Those are some really nice smells! And all in one person too. No wonder tobacco is needed!
Yep, especially the special tobacco that his mother makes. ^_~
Whoah, he’s got it bad (in a good way, me thinks). But will Mom have sympathy for his tobacco addiction?
Yep, really bad XD (He won’t think so, at least not at first) She has sympathy for it, since she’s partly to blame (she thinks). They are both werewolves. 😛
Your first paragraph is awesome! Nicely done. I also like the tension you have created. Trouble!
🙂 thank you! <3
Lots of tension for sure. Beautiful description. He must be as addictive as those cigarettes. 😉 Great snippet!
Thank you! 🙂 Yeah, he’ll try to keep away at first but it won’t work. XD;
Great snippet. I have the first glimpse of your character and how this guy gets under her skin and how that just irritates her. Love how you betrayed her need for a cigarette too.
Thank you! ^_^
It’s a b*tch when you can’t trust yourself. Nice job conveying wanting something you know you shouldn’t.
Yeah, it is. *looks at chocolate bar* …thank you. 🙂
Wonderful snippet – your descriptions of your main character’s reactions are so relatable.
🙂 Thank you!
Wow, lots of scents in that first paragraph, and I think (from reading the comments) I understand why scents are very important to your character…I’m looking forward to reading future snippets.
Yep 🙂 Thank you! The next snippet will be from the other character’s POV.
Oh! I love the emotion that comes off her, and the sensory detail really brings this alive for me. I especially love that last line.
Scheduled posting has saved my behind on many occasions 🙂 Although there have been other times when I schedule a half done post promising myself I’d get to it later, and never did. *redface*
Thank you! 🙂
Haha, yeah, that’s why I haven’t used it before. I’m pretty sure I will completely forget about it. XD
You know someone has it bad when another person smells like home to them.
Yeah. XD
Oh, he’s got it bad, or maybe a previous history?
Well, mostly it’s that he’s got it bad. But there is a slight bit of previous history there as well. But not with the new person he just met. XD
Very intriguing! I’m curious as to their past.
🙂 Thank you! …they are strangers to each other actually. 😛
Good job of showing his stressed out state. 🙂 I shove my hands in my pockets too when I get nervous. 🙂
Thank you! 🙂 …I fiddle with things, but Kiriya is a hands in pockets kind of person. XD;